Memories

[STEVE ROGERS]

Steve paused for a moment.

"But I care. You're my girlfriend and he's my best friend. I'm caught in the middle. I don't want either of you hurt." said Steve.

He sighed.

"I know he's different. HYDRA hurt him, changed him and forced him to do what they want. And even know he's still at least partially under their control. But I can't give up on him." said Steve.

Steve looked at her confused.

"I'm not casting you aside. At least I didn't mean to. I'm just hoping I might be able to reach him if it's just the two of us." said Steve.

Steve then looked on in shock.

"What? Thor's signed pro and you are as well? Then Natasha was right and we are already dividing. Tony. Thor. and now you. This act is wrong. People deserve their right to privacy. I don't tend to mingle with many people outside of SHIELD and superheroes who can protect themselves and do this for a living. But some superheroes have significant others, friends and family who can't protect themselves. This act will just hurt them and that's the reason they put on a mask in the first place so no one they cared about would get hurt." said Steve.

He was disappointed she was siding but she understood her reasons. He was really worried about those heroes with secret identities like Spider-man. Even now he had no idea who he was but he respected that. And then there was Jack who already was growing on him like a little brother he never had. He didn't want either of them hurt as well as any of the others.

"Alien life would have come here sooner or later. Loki, the Chituari or another alien race would have come here to conquer or destroy the planet. The way I see it you, Thor and the others made us aware of possible threats out there and allowed us to prepare ourselves. It was only a matter of time before someone attacked Earth anyway." said Steve.

He smiled at her.

"I could never hate you. I'm just disappointed. I fear this could only aid our enemies in HYDRA, and the Hellfire Club. This may end up in more battles and some we may not win." said Steve.

He smiled at her as she left and wasn't sure what would become of them. He hoped this didn't end up tearing them apart or if sides were taken he didn't want to have to fight her, Thor, Tony or anyone else. When they already had enough to deal with. He was pulled out of his thoughts hearing Bucky speak. He smiled and turned to face him.

"I can't pick one of you over the other. You both mean a lot to me." said Steve.

Steve shook his head.

"Because you're my best friend. The brother I never had. You always looked out for me when there was plenty of times you could have walked away. Or looked the other way. You never turned you back on me and I won't do the same to you.

I blamed myself for your death until I saw you again and I still feel like I have some of the blame. I shouldn't have let you come on that mission. Or I should have pulled you up. You suffered for years because I failed you. Well I won't fail you again. I will find a way to help you or die trying." said Steve.

He had this haunted look in his eyes as he spoke and he wasn't even aware of it. Having Bucky alive had taken some of the guilt but not all of it. He still blamed himself and he'd tried to bury it in work by working with the Avengers and SHIELD missions. But then he was considered a fugitive and he had more time to think about these things. He nodded at Bucky's words.

"I think if it came down to it they wouldn't hesitate to kill you if they had to. But I hope it doesn't come to that." said Steve.

He shook his head.

"Maybe you believe that but I know it's not true. You had no choice. They kidnapped you and brainwashed you until there was almost nothing left in you of my friend. But they couldn't break you completely because you recognized me. And you kept recognizing me no matter what they did.
I will never stop believing in you and I know you're not a killer. It's what they made you do." said Steve.

He paused and looked at him sadly.

"No. I'm going to find a way to heal you. To remove the brainwashing. I'd rather you were alive and safe even if you never remember anything else about our past. At least you'd be out of their control.

Steve grinned though as he mentioned Sif.

"She is Lady Sif an Asgardian. She's beautiful, strong and so wonderful." said Steve.

Steve chuckled.

"I guess so. After Peggy I never thought I'd find anyone. I'd had crushes before but never really acted on them. And maybe this won't last but I had to try." said Steve.

[JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES]

Bucky listened to Steve and although the memory of him being at the blond man’s side for years it still felt alien to him. He was still learning who he used to be and how to cope with what he’s done as the killing machine he was turned into by Department X and HYDRA. Dealing with what damage he’s done as the soldat throughout the years was one thing and of the two things most probably the easiest because it was real even now it felt real and he remembered every single victim of the Winter Soldier. But Steve did not belong to this part of his story but to the one book that was his former life as a normal human being who was nothing special. But even if Bucky was still a pale shadow to him he knew he could somewhat trust Steve. Not because he remembered every story of their shared life before everything changed for them both. Steve was the only family he’s ever had and the only other guy who similarly is out of time and place. He was his only hope and he needed him. The sense of Steve’s words about blaming himself for his death had not the wished effect on Bucky because he could not remember much that has led to his “death”. He has had flashbacks of him falling down a train but what has happened beforehand was gone. In fact, everything Steve said did not reach the true Bucky or better, his remains and so he stared at the man who claimed to have failed him. Don’t fight a losing battle… even though you like being punched, he added the last part with a lightly amused smile. Concentrate on battles you can win because you’ll never know if you can trust me with your life. A long time ago I might have been the shield for you, but these times are gone. And here the shadow of Bucky shone through and the doubt about himself broke free. Yes, he doubted himself. Granted, he has saved Captain America from drowning but it was also him who shot him and punched him, determined to terminate the hero of the US Nation. Bucky knew that the Winter Soldier will come back to surface and everything will repeat itself. It was only a matter of time. Steve, you need to let go off the past… he refused to say ‘you need to let go off me’ for Steve’s sake because even now the remains of Bucky were trying to protect his friend, this time he was protecting him from the black truth that there was no going back, for neither of them. I would of course, appreciate if you or your friends would find a way but do not sacrifice everything for a lost course. Besides, I won’t be a laboratory rat. So if you should find a way, make sure it will be the right one. Bucky approached the energy field that was keeping Steve safe and separated Bucky from liberty. You’ll never change, eh? You were always thinking of others and never about yourself and with a brief glance down to the shield Steve has brought with him, Bucky has made clear which burden Steve truly was carrying. Bucky never has admitted it, not to himself and not to Steve anyway, but he felt useless every since Steve, this little guy who knew every small and dark ally of Brooklyn because of the fights he has picked, had become the hero of the nation. Bucky was never jealous of Steve nor did he envy him, he rather felt sorry for Steve and at the same time feared to lose him to a world that had not cared for the boy that only wanted to fight for America in World War II. And what has survived of it now? The Bucky that was still there but composed of scattered pieces would be the shield for Steve over and over again, not caring about himself. To Bucky, Steve was and will ever be the little guy who would never withdrew from a fight. Even now, you should follow and talk to Sif but instead, you are here talking to me. Steve, this way you’ll never get lucky. lyrics: TIM MCMORRIS words: 719 tagged: LADY SIF outfit: here! notes: / TEMPLATE BY LITTLE BITTY PRETTY ONE @ CAUTION 2.0

[LADY SIF]

"That is not so. You know that is not so. It is just for the safety of the people on midgard. What if those special people seek to turn against their own and then what? you think that all shall be well. It is a safety measure and nothing more. Natasha is not right this, isn't about sides nor is it about a divide. Even Banner with his powers has signed the accords, he trusts in his people as should you. I am saying this because you are my partner. This isn't about sides and I would never hurt you, if a fight were to happen. You must believe me." She told steve seriously and wondered if, he truly did believe her. Though that being said even Sif didn't know if she truly believed her own words, she would not know what to do in that situation, go against Thor and Asgard for Steve?... She cared deeply for him, she does. Sif only wished Steve would spend less time talking about Bucky and worrying about him and everything to do with Bucky and more on there relationship.

"That is not true. It was only a matter of time before my people would of come to midgard, how many people do you think died during the battle of new york?... How many innocent were killed in cold blood in the avenger quest to make peace to save your world. How many more innocent lives Steve. Must die before you come to realise that not every hero, tis never truly an innocent man." Sif pointed out to Steve before leaving him to watch and wait for his dear friend to awake. inside the kitchen  Sif sighed deeply as she leaned against the counter. She wasn't annoyed, ok maybe she was somewhat annoyed with Steve, to Bucky Sif was second best and that was not good enough, she shouldn't have to deal with Steve emotional baggage and Bucky as well, but she felt herself accepting the situation. Steve was a very stubborn man and he was not going to give up on his childhood friend, it was that simple. He did not care about other people's opinions on Bucky or what he has done. Because he was his best friend and he was there when no one else was. It was noble and sweet of him to care so deeply for someone but sometimes that loyalty and that love for a friend, can sometimes blind your judgement or even opinion whilst in there presence.

Sif had signed the act in support for it, this wasn't anything to do with bucky or even Steve. Thor was right, it would help protect those with a special gift and if it wasn't for Loki's presence and chaos he has caused midgardians, other being would not have made themselves be known to midgard at all if it wasn't for them and yet it was true. ever since Thor and Loki presence on the Midgard, being, after villian kept appearing, time and time again and sadly the innocent got caught in the crossfire. In the attempt to maintain peace. Sif understood Steve opinion on it, she really did but he needs to see it from her and Thor side, he needs to hear from Tony point of view aswell all those people who has agreed to the act it is a matter of opinion nothing else. Surely Steve could respect other people opinion. 

Sif quickly made herself, steve and bucky coffee to drink and made Bucky a ham, cheese and salad sandwhich. It was probably the only thing Sif can make on Midgard without burning the whole kitchen down, she slide the white bread into to large triangles and thus, smiled to herself placing the items one by one onto the tray. Returning into the room where Steve and Bucky was. "Oh I see, our little soldier has awake from his slumber." Sif teased, smiling at bucky. "I made you something to eat, I hope you are hungry. I bid you forgive me for sandwich are of the only things. I can make without burning the kitchen down." Sif explained to Bucky, she glanced at Steve, offering him, his cup of coffee to drink. Sif watched as the force field had vanished. She flicked her long raven mane out of her face, revealing to Bucky her bruising neck. his had his metal hand prints ever so clearly around her neck. "Blame Steve. I did not know what you like either. So I do so hope that ham pleases you." Sif walked over to the bedside table and placed the tray down, picking up her own cup. 

Sif allowed her eyes to truly take in his features, he was pleasing on the eyes, wasn't he. His big blue eyes held an emotion in there that Sif could not identify, was it suffering? She was not certain. Her gaze silently moved over to his arm and wondered what happened, she knew from Steve words that he was experimented on by HYDRA. Sif gave Bucky a smile and boldly went over to Steve and sat on his lap. Well where else was she suppose to sit upon the floor?... Not happening plus this closeness might ease Steve's nerves into wanting to move there relationship up a level. "So what did the captain and soldier talk about whilst I was gone?" Sif asked Steve, she smirked at his blush, finding it oh so cute when he was so prudish and coy to the closeness of women. bless him. Sif will have to be patience with him. 



STEVE ROGERS

[STEVE ROGERS]

Steve shook his head.

"It may seem like a losing battle but it's one I won't give up on. Maybe you can't remember some of it or any of it. Maybe you never will. And I've made peace with that. But you're worth fighting for. You were my shield for years now it's my turn to be yours. And help you anyway I can. At the last get HYDRA's control out of you. It's the least I could do for you. To give you your freedom back." said Steve.

Steve smiled at him.

"But the past makes up so much of me. That 70 year sleep kept me out of the action and then I've spent every day after that fighting bad guys, training, and trying to adjust tot his world. Well until I met Sif. Then things changed a little. I didn't think I could really find someone after Peggy. I've had feelings for people before but never acted on them and I'm glad I took a risk with Sif. Even if might not work out as I know nothing's guaranteed." said Steve.

Steve smiled at him.

"I suppose that's true. I always wanted to be a hero even before the serum. You had to bail me out of trouble so many times but you never gave up on me. You could have walked away but you didn't. And I won't give up on you." said Steve.

Steve blushed a little at Bucky's words feeling like a bit of his friend was still in there caring for him and teasing him.

"This is still new with her. I'm scared of screwing this up. With Peggy there was so much going on we never really had a chance before I fell asleep. And now Sif could be recalled to Asgard at any time. I'm going to treasure any moment I have with her because I know it could be my last. She's immortal but I'm not. Even with the serum I know I'll die eventually one day." said Steve.

He looks up in surprise as Sif rejoins bringing food and drinks. Steve takes a cup and smiles at her.

"Thank you." said Steve.

He saw her bring some food to Bucky and was surprised she brought down the force field. There wasn't a way to send it through without taking the whole thing down? That was kind of a design flaw. She knew Bucky would jump at a chance to escape. He could take the food and run or pick something else up later. He looked confused at her.

"Why'd you deactivate the force field? Won't he try to escape?" asked Steve.

He would understood if she gave him food but she'd set it down next to him so he was wondering why. Was she trying to be more understanding? He wasn't sure what was going on. He was surprised when Sif tried to sit on him when he'd been standing talking to Bucky and nearly knocked him over. He stumbled back more confused and wondered if this was Asgardian tradition he wasn't aware of. But he didn't want to insult her either so he just stayed silent.

JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES

[JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES]

It felt odd to talk so much with someone he used to know and yet, did not know anymore. Steve, the name sounded familiar in his mind and ears, even the face was familiar and yet those memories mixed up in his mind did belong to another life; one that was now lost to him. Yet, here he was talking to the man he was sent out to emliminate because Hydra told him so. Bucky had never felt so unsure about a situation and about himself as he was feeling now. There was still the urge to leave this place and everything behind, go back to his new 'home'. If he should dare and write a message to Wesley, telling him where he was? But that would mean he would betray Steve since he did not know how his new employer was feeling about the Captain. Decisions were something he had to learn anew after a long time in which he had no idea what it actual meant, making decisions. He listened and watched the man who used to be his best friend and couldn't help but have a bittersweet smile upon his lips while hearing words of determination and hope, something he has lost a long time ago. There's no way you'll ever lose your optimism, is there the question left his mouth but Bucky wasn't saying it because he needed an answer to that question. Steve already made clear, through his words and past actions, that he would not give up on him. You do know that I'll try to kill you, it only is a matter of time. I might not be associated with Hydra anymore because they cannot find me – at least for now. But what happened when I woke up here can and will happen again... There was no way to put that nicely so he was speaking brutally open with Steve. And it will not only affect you, Steve. Your care for my wellbeing is wasted and blind your sight for everyone around you. He'd got quite and the focus of his eyes changed and wandered to Sif who was entering the room again. He remained wordless when his eyes followed every move and step of the blackhaired woman and when he discovered the bruises his metal fingers have left on her swanlike neck. So, this was what has happened and what Steve refused to tell him when he'd asked him. The blue of his eyes that carried so much of different bitter feelings vanished from the sight of the other two when Bucky lowered his glance down to the floor and up to the tray Sif has placed on the bedside table. There was no thank you leaving his lips since he forgot the meaning of it during the 70 years of torture and killing. He wasn't used to anyone who was showing kindness to him, he was not even thanking his new employer for setting up an appartment for him, one that was way too luxious for his liking. Some might think he was being rude or taking everything others did for him for granted, but that was none of Bucky's concerns. Then it was Steve's question why Sif has deactivated the force field and if Bucky was about to escape that made him look up again, somewhat amused by the words. There were a lot of answers he could give his friend but only one made it over his lips, and it was just another question for Steve. So, I am your prisoner then? Somewhat, he wasn't surprised about it, it was only natural that he was kept under lock and key, it was a smart move. But then Steve's words were nothing but words. What surprised him the most was that Sif, the one person in here who'd the best of reasons to keep him locked away was the one person who showed acts of kindness. Again, he was puzzled by such behaviour but he couldn't bite his tongue to prevent himself from teasing his friend. She's one of a kind, Steve. He smiled at Sif and her attempt to sit on Steve's lap while he was standing on his feet... Perhaps he wasn't the only weird person here? The sandwich Sif has made for him stayed abandoned by Bucky, another remnant of his time with Hydra. A weapon did not require much in its life; no food, no social interacting, no warmth, no hope. We were talking about Steve being a dork for clinging on old times instead of focusing on what he's got now he said light hearted but again with this smile that hid the bitterness in his heart from prying eyes. Of course, it was a teasing potshot towards Steve but it was once again Bucky's attempt to make the man see reason, this time however with a witness around. Perhaps Sif is able to make Steve see the truth that he should give up for once in his life. lyrics: TIM MCMORRIS words: 841 tagged: LADY SIF outfit: here! notes: / TEMPLATE BY LITTLE BITTY PRETTY ONE @ CAUTION 2.0

[LADY SIF]

Sif gave Bucky a comforting smile, she could tell he was almost at odds with the fact that she was being nice to him especially after he had attacked her. But that was in past this was the present and Sif was more than willing to build and form a relationship with Bucky, since he means so much to her boyfriend Steve. Sif glanced over at Steve when he question her about the force field. "You have to have more faith in your friend Steve." She told him and sighed deeply at Bucky's comment. "You are not are prisoner. However but I do request Steve to bring the force field back up. I'm going to have to search you as a precaution. Incase you decide to turn your other side." Sif explained, though Bucky remained in his seated position, she moved closer to him still and knelt down infront of him.

"You believe that, because of what you've endured. You aren't worth the risk nor the fight, but their are a few people that would beg to differ, upon that argument. You may have been victimized and the mental and physical scars you wear are a constant reminder of them and what they did to you. Do you not wish to wonder what freedom is like if only for a moment?..." Sif murmured quietly to James, she glanced over her shoulder at Steve, perhaps she should tell him to back off, after all there is only so much a person can take for one day. She waited for James's response in allowing her to research him for any hidden weapons. 

Sif rolled her eyes at both men's reaction to her apparently moving to sit on Steve's lap whilst he was standing. She moved away from Steve to the steel chair next to him. Sif wondered whether or they she rise the barrier, perhaps that would trigger off some horrid flashbacks for him. She would have to discuss that with Steve later on. Grinning at Bucky's words Sif noticed his food was untouched and glanced up at Steve.

"There is nothing wrong with the past, it shapes and defines us for the present and the future. Though I do not understand what dork means. I am still trying to come to terms with midgardian vocabulary." Sif explained and took a sip of her tea, ah this drink was rather nice though coffee was amazing! it was so interesting for Steve to be introducing Sif to his ways and bring her into the current times.It must be amusing for someone who was asleep for 70 years to do this.

"If you like I can make you something to eat? or perhaps you can finally take me to dinner, tonight would be nice wouldn't you agree?.." Sif asked Steve, since he was a fugitive the couple hadn't had a first date and if they did have such things, they would be in safe houses or back at the avengers base away from onlookers. "Oh and Bucky's please try and eat something and relax. I know tis easier said then done, but at least try." 

STEVE ROGERS

[STEVE ROGERS]

Steve shook his head.

"No. Even though all this fighting has probably changed me in ways I probably don't know. Fighting in World War 2, then against HYDRA, Ultron and other threats. But soetimes I still feel like that kid from Brookyln wanting to help the world. And despite the serum I can't save everyone. But I won't stop trying." said Steve.

Steve nodded.

"I know. When the programming takes over there's hardly anything left of you in there. But you're still fighting it. There's plenty of times you could have really hurt or killed me even before today. But you hesitated or you'd remember something. It doesn't have a complete control of you like they wanted it too." said Steve.

Steve sighed.

"I won't let you hurt anyone else. Even if I have to take you out. But I hope it never comes to that." said Steve.

Steve truly felt that if Bucky died especially at his hands he'd lose a part of himself and he didn't know who he'd be after he recovered from that. If he was ever able to. He smiled at Sif glad she was here and nodded to Bucky's words glad he was pulled out of those depressing thoughts.

"Yes she is. Sometimes I wonder how she puts up with me." said Steve, his mood feeling a bit better at the moment.

He chuckled hearing their banter.

"I remember my past so I can make a better future. I don't have much now aside from the two of you, and my friends. I do miss being able to go outside without having to be in disguise or looking over my shoulder. But that'll happen again one day." said Steve.

Steve turned to Sif and nodded.

"We could try but it'd have to be in disguise. Maybe we could try Jack's pizza parlor. The food's good and we could plan it at a time where there's few people. So less chance of me getting recognized. I'm not sure if you need a disguise or not though." said Steve.

In normal clothes Sif could probably pass for a human. But if there were people who remembered her from her time in New Mexico helping Thor fight off Loki or had seen her wearing her armor people could recognize her. Granted it'd be a slim chance but they didn't need attention drawn to them out in public either.

Steve looked as Bucky didn't eat.

"Sif's right. You need to eat Bucky. It's not poisoned or anything like that. Please eat something. I'll get you something in particular if you want it. Hot dogs, pizza. You name it." said Steve.

JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES

[JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES]

He frowned at Sif's words and it wasn't a questioning frown at all. I decide... he repeated as if he was more than confused, but again he wasn't. Bucky rather felt angry at the words she has chosen. Then he remembered that Sif had no clue about what really has happened to him. Hell, not even Steve could tell with certanty what had been done to him. I cannot decide to turn into the Winter Soldier. It's not my choice, nothing of what has happened had been my choice. The only thing I've decided today was to stay here instead of leaving you as soon as the force field was done he explained and at the same time held his tongue about his own decision to challenge Natalya and to try and eliminate her and if this failed, that she would kill him. But instead she decided otherwise and bring her here! It wasn't my fault I woke up here. It wasn't my fault it was the Winter Soldier you were facing. Out of some respect for Natalya he didn't blame her by telling her name. But yes, it had been her... She should have killed him. He did not like how Sif was looking at him... or rather he did not like how she was treatening him. Yes, he was being a danger but only if he wasn't himself, whoever that was, or if anyone was trying to kill him. SI'm not your prisoner at yet, you tell me to search me for hidden weapons; you tell me to bring back up the force field just in case. You're funny. That's how a prisoner is handled, and don't tell me that isn't true. I should know best. Bucky was really being pissed right now. Granted, Sif was trying to be understanding, she was trying to be nice but she failed. Her words as well as her behaviour changed with every new conversation. There was nothing stable with what she was saying. However, before it would escalete and she would go against him because she was so frickle, he decided to play and hide his discomfort about the situation. Although you should have done that earlier when I was unconscious, I perhaps fail to see why you are asking to search me again he winked cheekily at her and then looked over her shoulder to Steve. For the record, Steve. It's what she wishes to do, not me. It was Bucky's old way to deal with situations that could easily go wrong, make joke and everybody will be fine. Then his face turned serious when he heard Steve say that he would take him out if it would ever be necessary. Bucky knew better than taking those words serious but more than that he did not wish for Steve to be the one who has to do that. The man would never be himself again. Or would he? Perhaps he was wrong about Steve and their friendship he has read about in the museum. After all, Steve had never looked for him when he fell from the train, he took for granted what everybody told him after he had woken up seventy years later. Had it only been Bucky who would have followed Steve and not the other way around? After all, it was Bucky who sacrificed everything for Steve. There were these doubts again that made him hinder to believe that he was this Bucky, because the Bucky deep within him, the Bucky who's shattered pieces were still present was happy to see his friend safe and sound no matter what has happened in the past. This Bucky even ignored what has been done to him, knowing exactly for whom he's gone through hell. I appreciate the care you two show for my wellbeing, but grant me the freedom to decide on my own what I need. It might sound like a simple request but to Bucky it was more than simple. It meant the world to him to have finally the freedom to decide what he wanted and not what everybody else wanted for him to do. Go to your date and do not worry about me. Since I'm not your prisoner I assume I'm free to decide where to go? Now, the answer to that question will be interesting to hear. lyrics: TIM MCMORRIS words: 732 tagged: LADY SIF outfit: here! notes: I think we can start to wrap this thread up. TEMPLATE BY LITTLE BITTY PRETTY ONE @ CAUTION 2.0

[LADY SIF]

Sif wasn't sure if she had insulted him or not, she was careful in selecting her words whilst talking to him but when Bucky had responded back to the Goddess, she told was frowning in return at his words, though unlike him she had tried to keep her temper in check. "And yet you've just explained you cannot decide. So which is it? you can decide whether or not you wish to eliminate myself and Steve? Or is it the fact that you know that I am right in saying you have no decision on when or where you turn into the winter soldier. Furthermore. You would do well not to intentionally upset me or insult me." Sif last few words was a warning, she wasn't the type of women to allow anyone three strikes and then there out it was more so, one chance type of thing and Bucky has already blow it with her, so if he continued to talk to Sif in the tone and way in which he is currently using. She might have no choice but to knock him around just to make him know his place. 

Sif sighed deeply and crossed her arms over her chest and glanced over to Steve, as if to expect him to chime in to defuse the rising tension between Sif and Bucky.  "Oh I am sorry. Please forgive me forgetting that notion earlier. I was to flustered over the fact that you had almost crushed my windpipe! and now I know for certain you have something on your person, because you are becoming to defensive for my liking. Do you not hear yourself?. Do you believe that you are the only person within this room to have dealt with hardship like that?.... You haven't the slightest clue of my story nor the things in which I have endured. Nor Steve." She pointed out to Bucky, ye he had a harsh life for the past 70 + years thanks to HYDRA but he was not the only person, who wasn't in control of there future or there own life. Sif knew she was becoming defensive aswell but she could not help it when Bucky was talking to her like that as if she was going to ok with it. Steve friend or not, she won't even allow Thor to talk her like that! and she's known him for millennium.

Sif suddenly found herself blushing deeply at Bucky's remark on her wishing to search him, she looked away from him. "Don't be so childish." She mumbled and it was nice for a moment that everything seemed to turn playful if only for a moment. Sif glanced up at Steve again when Bucky had asked whether he had free reign over the house. Sif was about to answer Bucky about them going out on a date. Sif gave Steve a shy smile. "Thor suggested Coney island and perhaps we can have that sleepover, you have been to eagerly trying to avoid." Sif gave Steve a wink, she knew he hadn't been with a women, so the whole dating thing is still very new to him. So Sif was more than willing to bring him up to speed. She giggled with delight at how bright Steve face had become. "Don't be shy Captain. We're all adult here." For a moment the young couple had ignore Bucky. Sif turned to Bucky to make him know that he was not ignore, standing up from her chair, she stood close next to the Captain. "Of course. We only wish for you to be at ease."

STEVE ROGERS

[STEVE ROGERS]

(ooc: And I just got the irony of Steve's best friend and girlfriend both having memory problems. poor steve caught in the middle lol.)

Steve nodded.

"Bucky's right. It's a form of brainwashing. It'd be like Loki's staff controlling people. Only instead of magic it's with technology and Bucky's fighting it. Or he would be the Winter Soldier the entire time. And the fact he has much control as he does is impressive. Of course I never doubted for a second those creeps could beat him for good. Without them bein able to brainwash him as much as they used to he gets stronger every day." said Steve.

Steve sighed hated that they were fighting.

"We're all assuming things Sif. None of us knows how the others lived." said Steve.

He chuckled as Bucky's joke if she wished to search him. Then froze as Bucky spoke again. Steve sighed.

"I keep failing you. I couldn't save you and you fell. Then I didn't look for you and let HYDRA take you and make you their prisoner. For 70 years while I was frozen in ice you were tortured, and forced to do their bidding. Both of us in our own prisons. Defeating HYDRA I thought freed you but the Winter Soldier's not completely gone. I could hold you here for years and never find a way to help you. It's not fair to you." said Steve.

He looked down for a moment and then Bucky and Sif talked about dating.

"I don't know if I could go out there and have fun. The more in public I am the more chance of me being recognized. Not to mention we have the Hellfire Club and HYDRA after us. And if that act passes soon even more will be after me." said Steve.

He looked confused as Sif mentioned a sleepover.

"We sleep in the same house already. Why would we have a sleepover?" asked Steve.

He was more confused of her claiming he was shy but shrugged it off. He knew very little about women and even less about Asgardian women. He turned back to Bucky and walked up to him pulling him into a hug.

"You are my best friend, and my brother. My family. I thought I could keep you here while I tried to help you. But that could take months or years. It's not fair to you. And part of me knows I should lock you up or kill you to stop the Winter Soldier. But that would make me no better than HYDRA. But I can't. You've been through too much already. If you lose control again I'll be there to stop you.

When I thought you were dead I felt like part of me was missing. I had Peggy and Anthony and my other new friends but it wasn't the same. And now they're all dead or retired. I can't put them in danger. Then when I saw you again that day I felt whole again. Even though you tried to kill me and my friends you recognized me at first. You even saved my life after the Hellcarrier went down. I might have drowned out there. I think HYDRA understimated our bond. You could never finish the job even with your memories gone because you've looked out for me and you probably always will. So I'm going to let you go. Because you don't deserve to live in a cage the rest of your life. You deserve a life Bucky. Even if it's without me." said Steve.

He pulled back reluctantly.

"If you ever need me I'll be there. I owe you a debt I'll never be able to repay but that doesn't mean I'll stop trying." said Steve, grinning at him.

JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES

[JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES]

When Sif spoke again Bucky listened and with every word she was saying he got confused. Hadn't he just told her to make her understand that it wasn't him who decided to come here; that it wasn't him who decided to go against her and Steve but that it was the monster within him he could control to a certain degree but not entirely? Sif should have listened closer to his words that jumping to conclusions that weren't even right. It seemed she did not listen at all or was messing up his words and ripping them out of context. No matter what it was, it confused and tired him. Instead of allowing her to make him being the bad guy once more, Bucky remained silent and just frowned at the woman's words and frickle nature. She was even more unstable than him... Perhaps she had gone through some kind of brainwahsing herself and now was jumping back and forth between two different persons? It was the only explanation he could find since it was apparent that there was something not right with her. At first she had been nice to him, had even made him a sandwich and out of the blue she attacked him and accused him of being untrue even though he did nothing else but enlightened her about his condition which she had no knowledge about. His eyes shifted away from Sif and back on Steve, who had not changed or else Bucky would be not able to remember him at all. It was Steve's continuity, his nature that had always been the same, that gave Bucky the feeling of having managed to come home finally. However, the fact that Steve apologized to him once again, made him feel uneasy. Steve might be the one person that kept him from killing himself but he was still somewhat alien to him. Bucky did not know how to handle it. Stop it. You are not responsible for me or for my actions. It was too much input for Bucky, too much Steve was telling him that he couldn't handle. However, when Steve came and took him into an embrace, Bucky was hesitant to return it but words that were spoken were so familiar to what he was feeling when he'd recognized Steve for the first time. When he did not feel anything that day, he felt something familiar when he saw Steve, something that reminded him of being home, a feeling that had been denied to him since he had gone to war. Slowly, he grapped Steve's upper arms and shoved him backwards, ending the embrace. He looked back to Sif over Steve's shoulder and grinned lightly. If you continue this behaviour Steve, Sif will think you're loving me more than you love her. Focussing back on Steve, Bucky gave his 'friend' an encouriging smile. Take her and spend time with her, she needs it... perhaps Steve wasn't the only one who needed to get laid. I won't kill anyone looking back and forth between Steven and Sif his eyes came to rest on Sif. I promise. It was kind of a potshot for Sif, since it was her who accused him of controlling the Winter Soldier and being able to turn into him whenever he wanted to. Have fun... he told them both and then directed another word to Sif: Sif, either you are more confused than me or you are a bad liar. That was his answer to her last words, she and wanting him to be at ease... She certainly was one of a kind – or so he hoped. lyrics: TIM MCMORRIS words: 612 tagged: LADY SIF outfit: here! notes: / TEMPLATE BY LITTLE BITTY PRETTY ONE @ CAUTION 2.0

[LADY SIF]

Sif remain quiet as she watched Steve and Bucky converse, she knew that Bucky didn't take to well to how Sif was speaking to him, but she knew how he felt and even if her memory was restored, she does gets moments where she gets a hazed flash back and sometimes her behaviour due to it can come across as hostile and defensive. Sif rolled her eyes at Steve's comment, turning her gaze away from the Bromance that was happening before her. She wasn't jealous, god no. She was just rather annoyed that Steve couldn't help but sprint to Bucky's defensive and not defence, when she was his partner not Bucky. But her. "That is not true. I've told you my story and when you met me. I had lost my memory and thus had it restored, I know exactly how he feels whether or not he or you agree..."  Sif voice trailed off for a moment, she couldn't help yet feel like she wasn't allowed to be apart of this situation and Bucky was right, she was feeling left out and ignored. She sipped on her cup of tea that she made for herself and wondered if her kind gesture of making everyone some refreshment was all in vain, the men seemed to be consumed within each other. 

Sif looked up at Steve as he spoke to Bucky about him being his responsibility, her gaze soften and shifted to Bucky. He seemed very uncomfortable for some reason. Her crystal blue orbs continued to move from Steve and back to Bucky. Sif was unsure whether or not, she should say something but she knew it not her place. What could she say to Bucky in order for him to like her, Sif felt the two had gotten off on the wrong foot and she was determined to make amends and befriend Bucky for Steves sake.

Sif watched as Steve embrace Bucky and chuckled at how cute Bucky look, it must of awkward but he must of had a gut instinct to trust Steve like Sif did with Thor. It was odd but even though she had her memory gone, she couldn't help yet feel at ease around Thor though on edge ever so slightly because her emotions were telling her to trust him but her head wasn't because she had no memory of him.... Interesting how things fan out. "You both care for each other quite a lot, You are brothers in arms, brothers in life and even after death. You still are brothers. You both need to put the past aside and try to think of what happens nexts... For both your sakes." Sif encouraged giving them a soft smile. Though her smile faltered at Steve's words. Did he not want to show her off, or at least spoil for her for all that she has endured with him. Sif was starting to believe that maybe it wasn't going to be, Steve was years behind men of today, they have been dating a couple of months now and not once have they went out in public. "If it's too much bother then don't worry about it... It's just I would of liked to see Brooklyn." Sif looked down, almost with a look of sadness on her face. She rarely allowed people to see her emotions, so Steve must consider himself lucky because she was only nice to him and one other man. 

Sif giggled and glanced over to Bucky. "Would you care to tell Steve what I am referring to." She asked Bucky, she was surprised that Steve still hasn't gotten any of her hints, she has done countless things to try and get the two of them to sleep together but he wasn't gotten any of them hints. Bucky seemed to pick up that the two of them should go out and enjoy each other company. Thank god at least he could read women somewhat more better than Steve could ever dream of. Perhaps Steve should ask his friend for some advice, that is whether or not the winder soldier remember that side of his life. Sif glanced over to Bucky and grinned at him, she was saying that she wanted him to be at ease. "Of course...."


STEVE ROGERS

[STEVE ROGERS]

Steve shook his head.

"It's how I feel. You were always there for me and when you needed me the most I let you down and you fell. And then I didn't even go search for you. I should have. To bury you or rescue you. They took you and brainwashed you and everything you did is partially my fault. You couldn't control yourself and I could have stopped it before it began. I wouldn't have blamed you if you hated me." said Steve.

He hugged Bucky briefly but was soon pushed back. He chuckled at Bucky's words.

"I don't think I'll ever care about anyone as much as you do. My best friend, my brother. My guardian angel. But that's a different kind of bond. What I have with Sif... well I was never that good at the romance department." said Steve.

He glanced at Sif.

"You have similar situations but it's not completely the same. You fought for your king and your country as a warrior. Bucky and I joined our country's army and he was taken from us and forced to fight against us. While I'm sorry you lost your memories briefly you didn't lose them as long as he did. Or went through what he did for over 70 years. What you both have gone through is awful and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But in some ways he had it worse than you did. At least you could turn to Thor or me or others here for guidance. Bucky had no one to help him all that time." said Steve.

He probably wasn't saying this right. He knew they both suffered in different ways but trying to compare it didn't seem right either. As the situations while similar were different as well.

He smiled glancing at Sif.

"I know we don't know each other too well and can't go out as often as we like. But I would like to take you out sometime. I'd just have to find the right disguise and place. How about the pizza parlor Jack worked at? It's secluded to a point and if we got at the right time no one will bother us. The last thing I want is us to get interrupted and a fight to break out. Or for you to get hurt again. Seeing you hurt like that was hard once. I don't want to go through that again." said Steve.

He paused looking at her oddly and shrugged not sure what she was referring too.

JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES

[JAMES 'BUCKY' BARNES]

Bucky remained silent when the both discussed who of them both, Sif or Bucky, have suffered more. He himself did think it was nonsense to compare the two fates with each other and he absolutely did not know why Steve brought it up in the first place. But what he could not understand at all was why Steve did fight for Bucky and defended him instead of siding with his girlfriend. Surely, Steve never has had much luck with women in the past and no matter how hard Bucky tried to get his friend a girl for his own, it did not fruit. It was easy to speak about the good things in Steve and Bucky really had believed it to be of success but all the girls he brought with him ignored his best friend out of whatever reason, Bucky never understood. But now, there was a gorgeous woman standing there and yet Steve only concentrated on him. Shaking his head at the situation he smirked. Steve, just stop it. You aren't doing yourself a favor. Sif knows more about losing grip of your own life than you, wheter or not I had one at my side. It doesn't matter. It was nice to know that there was one who would fight for him when he already gave up. No matter if Bucky agreed with Steve on that matter or not. But putting his own life, and the private life at it too, was too big a sacrifice. While watching them both interact with each other, Bucky could help but fell slightly annoyed by Steve's blindness for the situation. What Sif needed to do was to take over control, that was how Bucky got his friend out of the streets and among people. Though, nowadays it was more difficult to get out for Steve than the times before he was wanted or even the times before the great war. But there were things that never changed. Steve never thought about himself or his own happiness but always thought of others, except they belonged to his private life. Look at Sif now, she was desperately trying to be alone with Steve, to get their relationship on another higher level, and yet Steve did not recognize it. He thought of the political situation out there. Steve did not know it but he was hurting those he only wanted to protect. Steve! Get out of here with her! I'll be alright, you know I'm more grown up as you are after seventy years. Get out of here! It was rather rude how he said it, the more so since he was 'guest' here, but sometimes Steve needed clear words to make him see and get out of the shelter he's fled in to. Hell Steve! Even the most feared assassin in the world is able to walk the streets without being seen! I was a ghost to even the intelligence agencies and yet, people died from my hand. You sure as hell are able to bring your beloved girl to Brooklyn. He was fed up to hear weak excuses of Steve so he hadn't to be alone with Sif. The world was a dangerous place, now even more than before for people like Steve or especially for Steve, but the world had always been dangerous. What did it matter? Hearing Sif's plead to help her make Steve understand, Bucky wasn't inclined to do more than he has already done but he has spent half his life to get Steve into bed with a woman and failed. He won't stop it now since there was one who longed for Steve. Bucky got up from his seating position and approached his friend, smiling widely before he slapped him over the head. Do you wish to die a virgin? Go, get out of here, take her to Brooklyn and find a romantic place. And Steve, he then rested his hand on the man's shoulder. You may rest assured, that if you fail to make her happy, I'll find you with that he gave his friend a hard pat on the shoulder before turning around and making himself comfortable on the spare bed, eager to ignore the two from now on. lyrics: TIM MCMORRIS words: 711 tagged: LADY SIF outfit: here! notes: With this post, Bucky is out. TEMPLATE BY LITTLE BITTY PRETTY ONE @ CAUTION 2.0